Is Feminism always a fight for equality, or a fight for women only?

So maybe it’s just me, but as a kid, I was told many many many times who I should be and how I should change to be more liked by women. One of the biggest was being a nerd. Boys were told never to be a nerd. Don’t sound to smart around girls. Don’t talk about video games too much. There were even boys who did well in math and science who hid their the and homework scores to avoid being classified as a nerd. But it wasn’t just what you liked or was naturally good at that somehow made you less than a person. You couldn’t look the part either. If you wore glasses, expect to be called a nerd. If you were overweight or quiet, expect to be called a nerd. If you were overweight, you could basically forget about dating unless you were funny or had money. The only saving grace for being a nerd was that if you didn’t look good, at least have money so women will like you. That is what my parents told me, the girls in my class, that’s what I saw on television, ect.
I was told to be ashamed to be smart or like videogames, look a certain way, or even not being wealthy in the pursuit of not giving girls a reason to like me.
This isn’t to say that women don’t experience the same thing. They do. They are told to look and act a certain way to please males and to better their chances in finding a date. The problem is that we as a society only give attention to problems like this when they happen to women. There are so many gender neutral problems that people experience, especially in first world countries, but we have been told over and over again that the feelings of women is more important, so we must pay attention to their needs, despite both genders experiencing these frustrations. As a result, while women are being told that they are perfect no matter what, men continue to be told that they need to fit what women want instead of being themselves. Women like fit guys, so you better lose weight, dude. Women like tough guys, so you better show her how strong you are. Some women don’t want to work at all, so you better make enough money for the both of you. We don’t get those same “be who you are” or “you’re perfect the way you are” messages.
The fact that we give more attention to women for the same problem leads many people in 1st world countries to believe that men don’t experience this stuff at all. That men can’t be depressed, be suicidal, get abused, raped, attacked, or shamed. We just assume it doesn’t happen to men. That they are immune. Which leads to the whole feminist mindset of “we want to be treated like men”. What you fail to grasp is that you are already being treated like men, if not better. Your fight to end violence, but only for women, is not equality. Your support of women who cherry pick sexism out of video games is not equality. Your support of laws that further the assumption that men are always the aggressor is not equality. Your body positivity images directed only at women is not equality. At best it is simply making life more comfortable for women at the expense of the rights, support, and happiness of men. Because who cares about them, right?